Small talk as tennis

Small talk can be difficult, not just for Finns, but for many people around the world. How do you keep a conversation going with someone you don’t know well? The key is simple: ask questions, give open answers, and find a connection. A conversation is a joint project. Think of it like a tennis rally, the idea is to keep it going back and forward in a natural flow.

Ask questions and give open answers

In English-speaking cultures, asking questions is not only acceptable, it’s encouraged. It shows interest and helps spark conversation. But be careful not to kill the conversation. This is the tennis equivalent of hitting the ball into the net.

Q: What did you do at the weekend?

Good answer: I went hiking, picked some berries, and made jam.
What about you?
(✔️ This opens the conversation and invites the other person to share.)

Poor answer: Nothing special.
(❌ This shuts down the conversation and leaves the other person hanging.)

Use indirect and follow-up questions

Indirect questions tend to encourage longer and more thoughtful responses than direct ones. Once the person answers, follow up to show interest and keep things flowing.

Direct: Where are you from?

London.

Indirect: So, are you from London originally, or…?

Yes, I moved there three years ago.

• No, actually I’m from a small town east of London — Canterbury.

Find a connection

Make it easy for the other person to talk by identifying something familiar you can both relate to. This could be:

• Someone you both know
• A product you’ve used
• Their hometown or country
• Something they’ve seen or experienced

Use words like “Ah!”, “Yes!”, or “So…” to show that you recognize the topic. Then, build on it with a question or a comment.

• I’m from Manchester.
  → Ah! So are you a United fan?
• I’m from Dinex.
  → Ah, we had Mike Anders here last year from the R&D department.
• I’ve just come from the airport.
  → So, did you see the big wooden sculptures at the entrance?

Safe conversation topics

Here are a few “safe” subjects that almost anyone can talk about:

• The environment or surroundings
• Food and drink
• The weather
• Travel or animals
• Work (in general terms)

Tell a story

Don’t be afraid to tell a short, interesting story. It can be funny, surprising, or just memorable . However, avoid anything sad or controversial.

• I’m from Dinex.
  → Ah, we had Mike Anders here from R&D last year. He’s a great guy. He came in June, his first time in Finland, and arrived in a fur coat and Wellington boots! Everyone loved him.

Tips for storytelling:

• Keep sentences short
• Use simple vocabulary (e.g. he said, not he exclaimed)
• Use only one or two emotional words for impact
• Skip unnecessary details and get to the point

We hope you find these tips for small talk useful and if you would like to learn more about small talk or studying English please contact Galimatias by clicking this: